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en-US Jokes/Humor Forum in honor of bwcbob One sad day, bwcbob passes on, and ends up at the Pearly Gates. Saint Peter opens the Gates and states he's having a bad day, and that he will have to wait until things got better on Earth. Then he adds, "if you can make me laugh, I'll let you in". bwcbob smiles, ...:rolleyes: Mon, 21 Apr 2025 10:48:01 +0000 Mon, 21 Apr 2025 10:48:01 +0000 IPTVTalk / Kodi / Android / Dreamlink / BuzzTV / MAG254 / Formuler https://iptvtalk.net/forums/jokes-humor-forum-in-honor-of-bwcbob.37/ A woman's brain Wed, 25 Sep 2024 15:43:58 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/a-womans-brain.46935/ 46935 invalid@example.com (Ryu) Ryu A woman's brain has two sides. One is the left side, and one is the right side. On the left side, there's nothing right, and on the right side, there's nothing left. :)]]> 3 An Age Old Debate Thu, 16 May 2024 17:09:51 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/an-age-old-debate.46820/ 46820 invalid@example.com (crazed 9.6) crazed 9.6 Which is more painful?
A kick in the nuts or giving birth ?

Getting kicked in the nuts is more painful than having a baby, and even though I obviously couldn't really know, here is the reason for my conclusion:
A year or so after giving birth, a woman will often say, "It might be nice to have another child."
But you never hear a guy say, "You know, I think I would like another kick in the nuts."

-RogueNation2]]> 3 "Top o' the Morning" Tue, 19 Mar 2024 18:52:51 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/top-o-the-morning.44859/ 44859 invalid@example.com (4me2c) 4me2c To All Here...

:cool:]]> 5 A WIFE Sends a Message to Her HUSBAND Thu, 07 Mar 2024 18:25:17 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/a-wife-sends-a-message-to-her-husband.46782/ 46782 invalid@example.com (Ryu) Ryu A WIFE Sends a Message to Her HUSBAND
WIFE: “Honey, please don't forget to buy bread when you're coming home from work and lest I forget... Your girlfriend Elizabeth is also here and says hello to you.”
HUSBAND: Who is Elizabeth?
WIFE : Nobody, I just wanted you to respond, so I can have confirmation that you saw my message.
HUSBAND: But I’m with Elizabeth right now, I thought you saw us!
WIFE: What! Where are you?
Husband: Near the neighbourhood bakery.
WIFE: Wait, I’m coming right...

Read more]]> 4 Mistakes Sat, 03 Feb 2024 18:00:17 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/mistakes.46738/ 46738 invalid@example.com (Ryu) Ryu English Teacher: Give me the opposite of this sentence "Children in the dark make mistakes"

Student: "Mistakes in the dark make children"

Teacher: Get Out!

:) :) :)]]> 3 Stock boy Sun, 23 Jul 2023 18:30:35 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/stock-boy.46566/ 46566 invalid@example.com (Farmer1) Farmer1 A stockboy is stacking fruit on a display, when a lady asks "Do you have any pineapples? " The stockboy replies "Sorry ma'am, we are out of pineapples, but we will be getting a shipment tomorrow morning" The lady looks around some more. A few mins later she runs back to him asking where the pineapples are. The stockboy confused about her mental state simply tells her "Sorry ma'am, we are out of pineapples, but we will be getting a shipment tomorrow morning" The lady looks around some more...

Read more]]> 4 Government job Sun, 23 Jul 2023 02:08:57 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/government-job.46564/ 46564 invalid@example.com (Farmer1) Farmer1 A guy goes to the Government to apply for a job.
The interviewer asks him, "Are you allergic to anything?"

He replies, "Yes, caffeine. I can't drink coffee.

"Okay, have you ever been in the military?"

“Yes," he says, "I was in Iraq for one tour."

The interviewer says, "That will give you 5 extra points toward employment."

Then he asks, "Are you disabled in any way?"

The guy says, "Yes. A bomb exploded near me and I lost both my testicles."

The interviewer grimaces and then says...

Read more]]> 5 Happy Father's Day To All... Sun, 18 Jun 2023 13:55:08 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/happy-fathers-day-to-all.46537/ 46537 invalid@example.com (4me2c) 4me2c ]]> 0 'Do you think I'll live to be 85?' Sun, 07 May 2023 18:36:10 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/do-you-think-ill-live-to-be-85.46462/ 46462 invalid@example.com (Farmer1) Farmer1 >
> 
>>
>>
>> I recently went to see my doctor. After two visits and exhaustive Lab tests, she said I was doing fairly well for my age - I am past Seventy Five.
>>
>> A little concerned about that comment, I couldn't resist asking her, 'Do you think I'll live to be 85?'
>>
>> She asked, 'Do you smoke tobacco, or drink beer, wine or hard liquor?' 'Oh no,' I replied. 'I'm not doing drugs, either!'
>>
>> Then she asked, 'Do you eat rib-eye steaks and barbecued ribs?' 'I said, 'Not much... My...

Read more]]> 3 Common sense........... Mon, 01 May 2023 14:56:13 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/common-sense.46458/ 46458 invalid@example.com (Farmer1) Farmer1 Common sense...........

A very self-important college freshman attending a recent football game took it upon himself to explain to a senior citizen sitting next to him why it was impossible for the older generation to understand his generation. 'You grew up in a different world, actually an almost primitive one,' the student said, loud enough for many of those nearby to hear. 'The young people of today are much more advanced than people your age.

We grew up with television, jet planes...

Read more]]> 1 The length of a Snake Thu, 20 Apr 2023 22:01:43 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/the-length-of-a-snake.46446/ 46446 invalid@example.com (crazed 9.6) crazed 9.6 How do you measure the length of a snake ?

In inches only, no feet :eek:]]> 3 Boyfrirnd 5.0 to Husband 1.0 Thu, 02 Feb 2023 22:30:43 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/boyfrirnd-5-0-to-husband-1-0.46363/ 46363 invalid@example.com (Farmer1) Farmer1 The young woman who submitted the tech support message below (about her relationship to her husband) presumably did it as a joke. Then she got a reply that was way too good to keep to herself. The tech support people's love advice was hilarious and genius!
The query:
Dear Tech Support,
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slowdown in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewellery applications, which operated flawlessly under...

Read more]]> 3 I got cut off by a taxi driver last week Wed, 25 Jan 2023 15:27:24 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/i-got-cut-off-by-a-taxi-driver-last-week.46358/ 46358 invalid@example.com (Farmer1) Farmer1 I got cut off by a taxi driver last week.
I was walking through town today and I saw him at the back of the queue at the taxi rank.
I got in the first taxi in the queue and said "How much to the station ?"
"$5" said the driver. "And how much for a blow job ?" I asked him.
"That's disgusting" he said "Get out of my cab"
I got in the second taxi and said "How much to the station ?".
"$5" said the driver. "And how much for a blow job ?" I asked him.
"I'm not having any of that" he said "Get out...

Read more]]> 1 Nair hair remover Tue, 24 Jan 2023 22:21:32 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/nair-hair-remover.46357/ 46357 invalid@example.com (Farmer1) Farmer1 My wife found out that our dog (a Schnauzer) could hardly hear, so she took it to the veterinarian.
The vet found that the problem was hair in the dog's ears.
He cleaned both ears, and the dog could then hear fine.
The vet then proceeded to tell Andrea that, if she wanted to keep this from recurring, she should go to the drugstore and get some "Nair" hair remover and rub it in the dog's ears once a month.
Andrea went to the store and picked up some "Nair" hair remover.
At the register, the...

Read more]]> 1 a young gunslinger Mon, 16 Jan 2023 16:46:06 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/a-young-gunslinger.46338/ 46338 invalid@example.com (Farmer1) Farmer1 "An old woman walked up and tied her old mule to the hitching post.
As she stood there, brushing some of the dust from her face and clothes, a young gunslinger stepped out of the saloon with a gun in one hand and a bottle of whiskey in the other.
He looked at the woman and laughed,
"Hey old woman, have you ever danced?"
The woman looked up at the gunslinger and said, "No ... I never did dance ... Never really wanted to"
A crowd has gathered as the young gunslinger grinned and said, "Well...

Read more]]> 1 I was a very happy man Fri, 06 Jan 2023 18:44:56 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/i-was-a-very-happy-man.46329/ 46329 invalid@example.com (Farmer1) Farmer1 I was a very happy man. My wonderful girlfriend and I had been dating for over a year, and so we decided to get married. There was only one little thing bothering me—it was her beautiful younger sister. My prospective sister-in-law was twenty-two, wore very tight miniskirts, and generally was bra-less. She would regularly bend down when she was near me, and I always got more than a nice view. It had to be deliberate. Because she never did it when she was near anyone else.One day her “little”...

Read more]]> 0 Bad Weather Wed, 28 Dec 2022 02:52:47 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/bad-weather.46315/ 46315 invalid@example.com (Farmer1) Farmer1 Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made my lunch, and slipped quietly into the garage. I hooked up the
boat up to the van and proceeded to back out into a torrential
downpour. The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather
would be bad all day.
I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slipped back into bed. I cuddled up to my wife's back;
now with a different anticipation,
and whispered, "The...

Read more]]> 3 A senior citizens group charters a bus Sat, 24 Dec 2022 17:55:48 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/a-senior-citizens-group-charters-a-bus.46303/ 46303 invalid@example.com (Farmer1) Farmer1 A senior citizens group charters a bus for an overnight gambling casino trip.
An elderly woman comes up to the bus driver and says, 'I've just been molested!'
The driver felt that she had fallen asleep and had a dream.. So he tells her to go back to her seat and sit down.
A short time later, another old woman comes forward and claims that she was just molested. The driver thought he had a bus load of old wackos, but who would be molesting these old ladies?
About 10 minutes later, a third old...

Read more]]> 2 in honor of bwcbob Wed, 21 Dec 2022 15:30:03 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/in-honor-of-bwcbob.45110/ 45110 invalid@example.com (Ryu) Ryu in the memory of bwcbob this was probably first joke posted by bwcbob. :)



Two hours into my first day of work as a WalMart greeter, an ugly woman came in with her two kids.

Hearing her swear at them, I said, "Good morning, welcome to WalMart. Nice kids, are they twins?"

The mom answered, "Hell no, they ain't twins. The oldest one's 9, and the other one's 7. Why would you think they're twins? Are you blind or stupid?"

I replied, "I'm not blind or stupid. I just couldn't believe someone...

Read more]]> 342 An old retired engineer John Wed, 14 Dec 2022 02:45:01 +0000 https://iptvtalk.net/threads/an-old-retired-engineer-john.46268/ 46268 invalid@example.com (Farmer1) Farmer1 An old retired engineer John was celebrating 75 years on this earth.
He spoke to his toes. "Hello toes.", he said. "How are you? You know, you are 75 today.
Oh the times we've had! Remember how we walked in the park in the summer every
Sunday afternoon. The times we waltzed on the dance floor? Happy Birthday toes!"
"Hello, knees.", he continued. "How are you? You know you're 75 today..
Oh, the times we've had! Remember when we marched in the parade?
Oh, the hurdles we've jumped together...

Read more]]> 2 Flash Sale Popup